because god likes pain.

 if i were you, I would hide my hands away

tuck them closer underneath the blanket

because had I petrol and a match

what a beautiful thing it would be

to see both your hands on fire

and, don't talk to me about pain

my dearest

you know very little of pain

I have been accustomed to it

for so long that it is only

when you truly

hurt me

that the body pain

becomes Itself in its true monstrosity.

my monster doesn't sleep tightly

in my arms, no, my monster yells

and yells and yells and I silence it

and silence and silence it further more

until silence is all I am

and your petty hands are forgotten

ashes already

Wednesday

and I will be forgiven at the gates of heaven

because god likes pain.